Your choice of tense is just fine. There is an immediacy to it that only Present can give. Go back and check your punctuation, however. Remember to put a comma, or exclamation or question mark inside ending quotes in dialogue that is followed by a tag.
Your voice is also excellent, I might add. Just do a bit more "proofing".
I like your protagonist voice and the way you describe the scenes draws the read into that world. This story has a Blade Runner feel about it and that's one of my favorite movies.
I love it! The first few sentences drew me in and I couldn't pull away from it. I really like it!
I'm really glad you liked it! It's something a bit darker than what I normally write, but sometimes I just feel like writing something different. I've released the next few chapters now incase you were still interested in what happens next lol
Thanks! These books were just a bit of fun. I've taken my main book down for proofing, but its great to hear that I'm on the right lines.