BookRix

Thank you so much for your help and comment. I appreciate it. I will follow your advice it means a lot to me. ^_^
Thanks again.
Yours Truly,
Valerie Evening

I read the short piece...and I smiled. You conveyed a feeling, a host of feelings, experienced by so many of us; beginning school, not feeling "a part of", and then as life happens, finding those few true friends.
Now, to improve the story consider this:)

Check your tenses in each paragraph. Do they agree? For instance, do you begin in past? Stay there if you do. All following sentences should be in past tense except for dialogue:)

Examples of other things:
Page 15. "The necklace we had was so memorable to me. I still keep it until now."
Did you rid yourself of it? Until now suggests that you did.

Page 15. "If you feel lonely like me because you feel you don't have any friends. Just open..."
You have a phrase as a sentence. By replacing the period with a comma, a space, and then de-capitalizing "Just", then you have a complete sentence:)

Also, think about this. Instead of "reporting" the various incidents, SHOW them in-scene. Take a moment to open my short story, "They Were Laughing." I wrote it in-scene, wanting the reader to BE THERE. To actually see everything that happened through my narrator's eyes. I think seeing an example would help you understand in-scene writing.

Do you have a friend who can line edit for you? We all need them. Perhaps one of the older, more experienced writers here can assist you in smoothing out the grammaticals.

All that said, I enjoyed reading your work! Keep refining it until it's perfect.
Thanks for the memories:)
Patrick