I thank you, most that I post on here are rough, and yes they do need help.
David
You have good ideas and good sequence between action and reflection;however, grammar, sentence fragments and composition are very distracting. I suggest you read story outloud - make changes and then get someone to copy edit. Keep writing - good to read your work.
i did a school play on this book and i love it
Thank you! I'm pleased that you enjoyed it.
And welcome to BookRix!
David
I found myself drawn into this story, waiting to find out what would happen. It seems sad and yet there is hope at the end, of his rescue and return to his bride. Your ship descriptions are quite thorough. What a lovely, heartwarming tale of a shipwrecked survivor longing to be with his mate for life. Great job, David.
Melissa
Fan of David
You're a doll Melissa,
Thank you for reading this little story. I took one of my poems and made a story from it. There are some spelling issues in it, but I'm not perfect..lol
David
Fan of Melissa
lost at see....is a great story of neverending love....and a walk between between death and life.
GREAT WRITING!
sincerely greets
renate
He hung in there knowing he had to return to her! Love conquers all, doesn't it? Great, David! Good luck! Petra :)
Thank you for the kind comment my friend.
Yes, love can keep one alive.
~David
Very good writing. I feel that you have real talent. Keep going. You got a vote and a star from me. God Bless
I thank you for the great comment, and Star on this my friend.
It's always a pleasure to receive a comment like yours, brought me a grand smile. Thank You! And might I please add, that's a beautiful picture of the children.
Sincerely,
David
【≽ܫ≼】 ︀➯ http://︀n︀a︀k︀e︀d︀%2DⒼ︀ⓘ︀ⓡ︀ⓛ︀Ⓢ︀%2e︀Ⓞ︀n︀Ⓛ︀Ⓘ︀n︀ⓔ︀/c%2ftrack%2fl%2f︀bookrix︀%2f︀david.wood_1253073534.8559329510