:) Thank you for the critism (by the way, I don't find any of your comments rude- I live for critism like this!) I'm glad you enjoyed the story and I think I'll be posting some of my more recent work in the coming days :) I anticipate more of your feedback and thank you for taking the time to read my story :)
I appreciate the critism (it was kind of unbelievable but then this is the result of watching too much romance anime... ;) lol) and I am working on posting a few of my more recent works (this was written... last year)I look foward to more of your feedback and thank you for taking the time to read this :)
Selishxiii, recomended this story to me and I read it! It really is very well written, your characters are so real and believable! But, I wish that there had been some indication of her lonliness and the loss of her parents at home when she was getting up from school. I think it would have enhanced the story even though you wanted to save that part of the story until your exsplanation to andrew. Like maybe her looking at her... Show more
Selishxiii, recomended this story to me and I read it! It really is very well written, your characters are so real and believable! But, I wish that there had been some indication of her lonliness and the loss of her parents at home when she was getting up from school. I think it would have enhanced the story even though you wanted to save that part of the story until your exsplanation to andrew. Like maybe her looking at her... Show more
Its is a great start, I love your descriptions, especially the beginning, but when he just dragged he out of class, it was a bit unbelievable that he'd just do that, it was odd. Other then that thought it was great, and I'll be sure to read more of your works when you post them :)
-SelishXIII